life is good

That last post was one big lie. Not a sip of champagne that night - think I volunteered to be DD. And also, there will be no oodles of joy here. This week’s been one of the worst over the past 21 years.

Previous post wasn’t an entire lie however: I did, of course, go on to make bad decisions. Took slightly-less-than-perfect care of myself. ended up with 2 ACES nurses trying to convince me to go to the ER. Then made a potentially interesting situation pretty bad for a while - it’s still recovering. And I’m certainly maintaining that barely-existant amount of friendship in my immediate location.

Except now not only is it minus one more significant one, but that minus one has since decided to inform me at every inconvenient chance (and it’s midterms week. every chance is an inconvenient chance.) of my flaws and vulnerabilities and all sorts of other hurtful things that I’m really not even sure apply to me, but after so long he runs out of ammo.

People - young healthy college people - they do all sorts of things to their bodies that they shouldn’t. Over-caffeination, all-nighters, drinking excessively, eating food but not nutrition etc etc.

-4 hours later: friends came over. ransacked. went out. debated economic development over Stoli-diet cokes with H’s brothers friends. an amazing time. way past my bedtime. slept 2 hours last night. ish. too many midterms. early morning. yikes.

mood since 4 hours ago has skyrocketed. and i promise you that has nothing to do w/ the stoli. that’s all human interaction, meeting people, dancing and friends.

tomorrow: back to midterm paper writing mild to moderate panic. but no regrets.