life is good

I love free food. I love the people in my hall. I love distractions.

I have 2 tests tomorrow and am sleepless and very jealous of my roomate’s 2-day hibernation.

I fell asleep this afternoon, but then had to get up and go to class again. you’d think ‘i overslept’ is -maybe not an acceptable excuse, but at least understandable. but i guess when it’s a 6pm class that one’s out. bof. so i went. and i liked it.

i have a new job assignment, with the same people. there was my first assignment with her mildly scandalous ways, and now the pharmacy school has hired my bosses to hire us to test the pharmacy students. my role, really really coincidentally, happens to be a woman with not only the same last name as role #1, but also similar BC issues. If i have to hear anything more about BC, which i absolutely do, i’m gonna go crazy.          

and this time, it’s not 16 doctors in 8 hours, it’s 15 per session, 3 sessions per night. at least it’s at night and not 6am anymore, but still. that’s a lot of BC talk. you go crazy in these things i promise. it’s also every day of the week this time - not just once a week. i’m not gonna remember which dr said what after hour #1. but i will know everything there is to know about ortho evra.

i went to a business etiquette dinner on tuesday, and failed. honestly, if it’s possible to fail etiquette - i did. i read ’etiquette for dummies’ a few weeks ago because i’ve always been insecure that i’m not following proper procedures, but after that dinner i don’t even care. i’m proud to not have etiquette after that. 

surrounded by really uptight overdressed people, talking about uptight overdressed things, i sat there and realized the beauties of etiquettelessness. par exemple: i have never been too afraid to sweeten my coffee. i don’t actually sweeten coffee, i think it tastes nasty that way, but that’s not the point here. the point is that i will never suck-it-up and drink unsweetened-coffee out of the fear that people will judge me to have poor etiquette. i’d rather be seen as having poor etiquette than being too afraid of judgement to do things like sweeten coffee. - and if i was too afraid, i certainly wouldn’t sit there and whine about how nasty my coffee tasted, and how i wish i could sweeten it - if only sugar packets weren’t against the etiquette rules..  i’ll get over this one soon i promise. i’m done.

i did get a semi-free 4-course meal out of it, and i got to talk to some interesting people, and all-in-all it couldn’t have been that bad of an experience, because i’ve signed up for at least one each month for the rest of the year. :free food. food that doesn’t have that packaged-preserved-plastic quality of all the other foods on campus… it was lovely. even worth getting all upset for a night. or perhaps i can get over that before next month..  

so my sleeping habits have always been somewhat atrocious, but lately i’ve been really scared. this year i started fainting sometimes, and now recently i see things. i’ve always hallucinated somewhat just because i’m crazy, but now i’ll look at poles or people - and i know that they’re not moving, but the images of them - i see about 20 of them on either side..kind of stretched out.. i can’t explain it well.. i tried telling my friends as they were talking to me, but they thought i was kidding. i wasn’t. and i see sparkles. i think i wrote about this before.. it happens more now. i feel like this is what people mean when they say “seeing stars”. kinda scary, kinda entertaining.

i’m gonna stop before i sound completely bonkers. too late? no. because completely bonkers, is my textbook today. to illustrate some aspect of french grammar, the authors wrote a dialogue where a patient explains his problems and depression to a doctor. it starts out being a little bit weird, and then tout d’un coup, the patient starts talking about his dreams of professors chasing him down with red editing pens filled with blood…and ogres and all things sketchy. in all honesty, if i were writing a textbook about french grammar rules and had made it to chapter 10, i’d probably be a little bit insane too. maybe throw in some dialogues and examples that i found entertaining, but still… That, is bonkers. my delusional visions - which by the way i referred to as ‘delusionary’ the other day in my journal - those are understandable.

i also wrote “weightlisted”. and then thought about how much sense it made. no joke. at first it looked so wrong, but then i just thought about it and decided that it made too much sense to be incorrect. see also: coaches not couches. i’m not stupid. i promise. perhaps some mild-retardation, but these things - these i blame on the impressive lack of sleep in my life.       

things are getting fuzzy. i’m gonna go have some fig newtons and tea. maybe see where in the global economy my t-shirt is traveling to tonight.. mmm..shui jiao…mmm…

in 17 hours it will be weekend. hooray hooray